When confronted with the impossible question of what candle to light when friends are coming over, DON’T PUT OUT ONE CALLED TROPICAL ESCAPE!
Im serious. It totally smells like old ladies.
This is how I know;
Mom; go over to the shelf and read me the names of the candles so I can decide which one I want to light.
Me; vanilla…birthday cake…Christmas…cranberry…tropical paradise…
Mom; does the tropical one smell good? It sounds yummy.
Of course, it is a bad plan to refuse mother, so I had to smell the candle.
I had laid down on the floor, arms at weird angles, and stuck my tongue out like a dead dog.
Mom; WHAT DOES IT SMELL LIKE????
Me; old ladies!!!!
Mom; really? Ok so not that one. Maybe we should give that one to grandma…
By this point, I was rolling around on the floor with the old lady candle in my hand with a weird look on my face.
Mom; ya. Christmas present for grandma.
Candle dead fit over;
…footsteps down the stairs…
Katherine; what do you want? And why are you on the floor?
Me; don’t talk to me that way. I’m older than you.
Katherine; whatever. Why did you call me?
Me: SMELL THIS CANDLE
She looks at me like I’ve lost my mind, picks up the candle, and looks at my giant crazed smile again.
Katherine; im not sure if I want to smell this…
Me; SMELL IT!!
She pulls the top off, looks at me yet again, and smells the candle.
Katherine; that’s gross.
Me; OLD LADIES!!!!
I start laughing hysterically and rolling again.
Katherine; you are so weird.
She walks away and doesn’t talk to me again for another hour.
Katherine; DON’T MAKE HER SMELL THAT!